Sunday, November 25, 2012
Independent Women
Dear Independent Women:
Sometimes
women in general might think that being independent it is hard now a
days for many reasons such as being by ourselves without any type of
support from a male partner like moral, mental and spiritual. Sometimes
our current single status affect us from being completely happy, and
some cases we have carried a child from our previous relationship. On
the other hand, women's independence from male dominance has been
criticized by society in the last decades. The original woman's role is
based on dependency of family, men and society such being subjected to
house work, raising children and living surrounded in a "protection
zone". Now a days some women have being forced to depend on a man's
help when they face to hard circumstances because of their lack of
opportunities to exercised their valuable rights.
The idea
starts in being submissive and avoiding development of their own skills
to incorporate into society. According to Aaron H. Devor " Femininity, a
traditional formulation would result and warm and continued
relationships with men, a sense of maternity, interest in caring for
children and the capacity to work productively and continuously in
female occupation" (532). The word of femininity give us the idea of
women being able to work in certain fields for example; housewives, take
care of kids and cooking. Women would get more opportunities if they
have the courage to success by having the support of family members.
Mary M. Kritz and Douglas. T Gurak states that " observe fertility
levels in India remain high in a society characterized by arranged
marriages, dowries, early age of marriage, social segregation of the
sexes, limited spousal communication. They add that by restricting
women in physical movement, limiting their education and failing to
provide them with social support for birth control use". Women's status ,Education and Family Formation in Sub- Sahara Africa.
The choice to become independent to break free from a male dominance for a long time and the decision to get education
in order to incorporate myself into society. About ten years ago, I met
my first love that i would named Daniel, everything was perfect. He was
a nice guy he was smart and he had everything that a woman would wanted
and he also had a stable job so he made a lot of money. But I did not
care about his money at all I just wanted to be independent from having
children or cleaning and having a job for myself. That was a major wish
that I wanted to make come true. His idea was to have a housewife, of
course I wanted to please him, but i wasn't sure about having kids at
the time I was so young. My dad talked to me over and over to think
about if I was sure to have kids. At first he told me that it was fine
if I work and go to school, but I should have kids, so I thought that it
was OK. A couple months later, he changed his mind about letting me
work. He decided that it would be better to stay at the house, but I
could still go to school.
By the time, my dad talked to me again and of course I did not
want to listen. He was warning me about him that a normal man act a
different way like giving some freedom of choice but he acted
differently like overpowering. His family also was included Daniel got
influenced by his family. His family got desperate in him having a
family and a housewife even though he wasn't the only child. They pushed
him to the limit that he asked me on the phone if I would accept to
marrying him because he was going to buy an engagement ring the next
day. At this time had been passed a month in a half after he asked my
dad if I could date him. He made the proposal on the phone and I asked
him to wait a little bit more, but he said to me" take it or leave it".
My heart was broken but I decided to leave it, because I got raised
surrounded by " macho male dominance" and I wanted to break a dependency
cycle off. Now I feel proud of myself that I do not depend on a man for
anything. The only man I have depended on was my father.
Now a days many women might depend on a male figure under terrible circumstances like domestic violence. According to recent statistics, http://www.cpedv.org/Statistics "In
2008, 99 women were killed by their husbands,
ex-husbands or boyfriends in California and 14 men were killed by their
wives, ex-wives or girlfriends. California law enforcement received
166,343 domestic violence calls in 2008 - 65,219 calls involved weapons,
which include firearms and knives. Each call is based on information
from a written incident report". The importance of being independent
result in benefits for those women who made feel worthless under such
terrible circumstances. For single moms whom are already independent
feel comfortable with yourselves in fact, take advantage of
opportunities like experiencing being a father and a mother at the same
time. It can't be easy sometimes but you will be awarded later in life
from your children.
Women must believe in themselves to
succeed under many obstacles. In occasions, is not easy to be
independent, for women are always seen that they need to be protected.
It is necessary to value your skills, qualities and capacity to be
incorporated into our society. It is understandable that some of the
women wants to live depending on a male figure and there is nothing
wrong with that. Everybody has the right to choose what is convenience
for ourselves, and what do we want. Just remember make yourself valuable
specially in situations where women are mistreated by not having
education. Women are beautiful, fragile,intelligent and valuable.
Thank you
Nora Heston
The first sentence is extremely informative and touches base on what the paper will be talked about. I think that it could potentially be catchier for a hook, but it gets its job done. The introduction is one of the most important paragraphs in an essay; it informs the reader what the rest of the essay will be about. Nora I truly think you did an excellent job of portraying to me as a reading what the essay will be about. At the end of the introduction I was intrigued and wanted to read more. I couldn’t quite figure out the thesis until half way through the essay, but then I realized what it was. You make solid claims as to what your belief is and what you will defend in your essay. As for TEA, I believe you did a great job of building your paragraphs with plenty of examples and support with explanation and analysis of your examples. I enjoyed most was the personal connection you made with your topic because it gave me understanding and a deeper connection to the paper. I think many women go through what you have gone through but do not have enough strength to speak up about it. I think it is awesome that you chose to write your letter about this and bring awareness. Your sentences flow and you used awesome transitional words that Professor Knapp has taught us in class. I’ve read a couple other papers and some lack in the counterpoint department, I noticed that you did an excellent job on showing your side as well as the other side. There are a few weak sentences within the essay but your voice is well heard throughout. It is very important because it gives readers a different feeling. Your conclusion summed up everything that you had talked about as well as touching base back with your thesis. I had an awesome time reading your letter and I appreciate you being strong enough to tell others about your experience, to potentially open doors for other women. Good luck!
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